Opening Eyes

While they sat in that park, the small group of four just about as nervous as a group of deer at a waterhole a little too close a gang of lions. Anxious looks amongst them all. It was clear that no one was too proud to show that this was their first times. D picks up the bottle they had brought along, making it apparent that the event they were here for is about to begin. As they sat all in a circle, D placed the bottom on the floor in the centre of the little circle, as she had been so eagerly instructed to do by P. Unfortunately for P, D’s courage only allowed her to complete half of the task before her confidence faltered. Luckily for them all, K could not manage to contain himself and he gripped the bottle intensely after D’s hand had slipped off. With a quick look around to all, K noticed A’s eyes grow as his chest rose with the immense breath he was taking. K looked down again, as the bottle had begun to spin with his quick gesture. All eight of the eyes present were now fixed at this one point waiting, filled with curiosity and fear. As the rotating object begins to lose momentum the gaze becomes more intense. There was no turning back now, as the bottle slows and the fear grows. Finally as the bottle slows to a stop in overwhelming of relief had almost blanketed A. Although it did not last long, as he watched K moved toward D. The relief had completely transformed into anticipation.

The park was quiet, it was a late morning. The sun had been hanging at mid height for the better part of the morning as if he felt that it wasn't essential to awaken that hour while in the midst of autumn. The trees were whispering to each other under the force of the light breeze which also brought the rustling of orange and gold across the floor of grass and dirt. The nearby coast had always had a warming effect on the climate. Sitting on the steel platform in a circle of four, K slowly moved towards D. Only pausing for a moment just before reaching D’s lips, D was drawn in and at that moment they were lost. It hadn't lasted a few seconds before K had pulled away, to catch his breath and relax his now tense jaw. D’s face was overcome with blood that had rushed to her cheeks. It was obvious her experience was met with a certain amount of enjoyment. Having lost the ability to hold back, A had grabbed a hold of the bottle and had begun to spin it. Again it went, round and round until anxiety and hunger are about take over. As ‘A’ watched closely he waited while the bottle had come to a halt. But it seems his overzealous nature did not bode well for him. The bottle had pointed out both of the girls. K was highly amused by this act of chance and went forth with his suggestion at the ready, although the girls were even quicker to counter saying that if they had to partake then the boys would have to as well. Needless to say we needed another try. Then the bottle had reached the hand of the only person who had not held it yet, P was still mildly cautious, she slowly leaned forward on her knees so that she would be above the bottle. As she brought it closer to the floor, A was caught by a sight he had not before noticed. He looked at her and saw a golden face from the rays of light that landed on her gentle expression. Not sure where to place his eyes he tried to look away but found himself caught by another entrapping picture, in the position shes assumed above the bottle. Her feet and knees on floor herself raised and extended over so that she could look down, Her pants had held tightly on her legs showing off her womanly figure. Her warm soft hand holding back a string of hair, he was too lost in the sight to realize the bottle had been spun. It was as though God himself had interfered with the bottle, ‘A’ looked down to see that the time had finally come, He was still too nervous too even move but ‘P’ had already seen the bottles placement and was not willing to wait for ‘A’ to come to her. She edged herself toward him, her face glowing with excitement. ‘A’ took note of her and began to go in her direction. Not too used to the placement ‘A’ had almost missed the target, but ‘P’ was ready and moved directly in front of him. ‘A’ had all but stumbled into her, but once their lips made contact all the concern and worry started to disappear as if they had become lost in that moment. The sensation of their tongues rolling around against each other was incomparable to anything they'd ever experienced. As if time had seized to exist for just those moments, even the trees were silenced before the moment of contact. It was at that moment that all that he knew was destroyed and the way he would see life has completely changed. The moment when the reasoning of walking the path & taking the journey makes sense. Herein lays the reason for living. Love.

History: Chapter 1

In the beginning there was me, and my sister who is 4 years older than me, my brother who is 8 years older than me and of course mum & dad. I lived a relatively normal childhood or so I was told. When I was around 3 years old my parents divorced because my father was violent. So I spent the rest of my life living with my mum. My brother also only stayed with mum, but my sister did however spend a few of her primary school years living with my father. In early primary school I would go regularly to a paediatrician and an occupational therapist because I suffer from attention deficit disorder (ADD) and low muscle tone development. I was kind of a needy sickly child, but even being a single parent my mum still managed to get us everything we needed. Just about halfway through grade 4 we moved from where we were staying and went to live in Phoenix, Durban (SA) with my Grandfather (Mums Dad). And thats where I completed my primary school career.

The Beginning

Look look, it’s my serious face. Just kidding. Anyhow back to the point. From now on I’m going to be starting the history chapter, where I will go through my life bit by bit from the start so that everyone will be able to see how I ended up this way. This chapter will be starting soon, probably next week. The reason why I’m doing this now is because this whole blog wasn’t really clicking with me, so I figured if I do this it’ll be a little easier because I’ll already know what I will be posting. Also I thought if it’s gonna be a blog about me, it should have some stuff about me.

2009

Fuck, it’s here. Maybe we can still run, maybe not.
Oh well, it’s too late now. For some reason I can feel a fear so encompassing and abyssal as the depths of the sea, wait I don’t know what the depths of the sea feels like.
Ok ok, I can tell you this much. Whatever it is, it’s pretty fucking scary. It’s as if I’ve been walking through miles of desert sand and when I finally come to city, there isn’t a single sign of life and all my hope has be turned into despair. A despair so deep that I can hear my heart beating. Until it comes to a point where I drop to my knees to throw out a scream of utter agony.
How about we leave it at I don’t have good about this new year, not yet anyway.

A Beautiful Death

Nicole

Ok, there's this chick right. we were going out for a while some time last year. Well everything was going reasonably good until one she decides that she doesn't feel that way about me anymore. she wants to be friends! now that was never the direction i was expecting this relationship to go, but shit happens. Now as it turns out I was actually starting to fall in the love with this girl. So you can just imagine how I took this news. devastated doesn't even begin to describe the way I feeling at the time. To add to my misery I actually tried to be friends with her, but seeing her everyday only made it seem more like torture. So I went with that for a good couple of months, until I had no choice but to cut off all ties. That was eight whole months ago.
Without realizing it I found myself on mxit, an im application, and guess whose online. none other than the infamous organ crusher herself, Nicole. I, obviously, had no intention of saying anything, but out of nowhere she just greets me strikes up small talk, invites me to coffee and goes offline...
I think I'll leave it at that for now.

Life

One of the most frivolous things God has to offer. Have you ever wondered why you were here, ok stupid question. but here's the thing, can anyone really answer that question. I for one think there's no answer. In all my efforts, I never once seen something that made me stop and say "Boy am I glad to be alive". Fuck. Just thinking about it is making me nervous. Then are the days when I stop say "maybe it's me, maybe I'm the one that's broken and not everybody else". Then I walk outside and get mugged, and when I'm about to really angry I stop and think to myself (walletless and phoneless ), "Fuck it! That's life".